This saying is all well and good, but without confidence, many moms end up second guessing themselves

At a twitter party a few weeks ago, one of the questions was “What is the best advice you give a new mom?”

For me, being a StrongMom, means

And there are so many choices you can make:
Disposables or Clothdiapers
Breastfeed or Formula
Crib or co-sleep
Ferberize or Baby Whisperer

I could go on and on.

But in the end, it is you and your loved ones.  Whatever the outside world is doing, doesn’t matter.  Whatever the current trend is doesn’t matter. Whatever celebrities are doing, doesn’t matter.  Whatever the opinionated blogger/neighbour/friend/family member says, doesn’t matter.

If you know in your heart, that what you are doing is right for you, your partner, your family, then THAT what matters.

It took me a very long time to figure all of that out.

I read the books…lots of them.  I subscribed to the parenting websites…lots of them.  I was on pregnancy forums and later mom’s forums online.  So many places for me to find out what “the right thing” is.

But all I found was noise.  Battles. Wars.

Then I stopped worrying about what everyone else was going to think.  I stopped waiting for someone else to tell me what to do.

With fresh eyes, I went back to the books, websites and forums.  I went back looking for information about the topics that I wanted to know about.  I was doing research on my terms.

I was also aware of how I gave my opinion to others.  I had to be informative without being pushy or overbearing.  I knew how those other new moms were feeling.  I didn’t want to come off as a bully.  I just explained what was working for us and hoped that what I shared was helpful.

This same mindset is important for my girls to understand.  They are going to have to make many choices in their lives. They will be faced with many challenges where they have to do what is right for them. I can only hope that the example that I set will be a strong enough foundation for them.

So moms out there...the next time you spout off your opinion, don’t do it as if what you say is the be all and end all.  Share your information with others as encouragement and as one piece in a very large parenting puzzle.